Learning Curve

Learning Curve

I feel like I dropped back into the groove again! Busy doing just the thing, day and night, artwork projects moving forward with amazing satisfaction for me; and as I am the only audience I care a jot for, that works perfectly. I feel on track with my Indiegogo Project; true that is not reflected in my bleak dashboard statistical assessment; but visits to all my blogs are well up and I measure the momentum only by the progress  in my literary aspect, and adaptive changes: artistically and personally.

We all smoked like crazy then. Death seemed very close to us that year

I was paralyzed, starting Facebook at '0 understanding,' as well as some fear and prejudice about the platform itself, based only on my perceived negative opinion of what I see suck from the young people I meet, by their distraction and vulnerability in many aspects. Step by step I have made some friends, each who have helped me to overcome my fear and misgivings; and come to catch the flow and rhythms of what I now accept as just another media platform that at last, is only what users make it. 

Big on my mind then (1993), as usual I didn't know exactly what was coming, but this was key

Looking  at the many lovely friends of my first friend, Nancy Nebula who I had actually met in ‘real’ life, and wondering if there is some etiquette involved to offer my friendship, and frankly feeling creepy going along asking: friend me, friend me, friend me please. I don’t understand why I feel that way, but I do. It is not impeccable in  my estimation, because my motive is crassly commercial, and I am also handicapped because I fall in love with every person I get to know at all well. I can’t say if this is because I have lived monastically for so long, or is an aspect resulting from this. Then a picture of a beautiful young woman appeared and she offered me her friendship. In her eyes in her photo she showed me a woman who wants no bullshit. She generously took me by my keyboard and guided me to introductory Facebook aspects, and invited me to her inbox, that of course I had no clue how to get into.

Hard to file this one, it covers everything I reckon

We chatted together through an afternoon. I enjoyed her interaction, and she gamely tried to understand what the hell I was trying to tell her about my Indiegogo project and was supposed to be about, and this helped me see how complex and disjointed the thing really is. At last she understood at least that I want a wife, and she commended this desire, and comforted me that I am a good man in her no bullshit eyes. Because she came to me out of the blue, not a friend of Nancy Nebula, I take her as a sign; whenever in my life that I have felt near despair, the Spirit sends me a beautiful young woman with a purpose to lift me out of whatever has stalled my momentum.

Working towards Thoreau-A-Thon, many irons in the fire-always

I hoped that Spirit Beauty would invite me to chat again, but she was silent, and I had not figured out how to invite her yet. With the courage she gave me I invited many friends and seven responded kindly, if some reluctantly so far. Exchanging thanks and greetings I stuck up two more very different chatt friendships, First with a young Uruguayan  bride whose amazing beauty delights me, her figure is such as I term ‘Tomahawk!’ because she knocks me out! Whenever in younger days I spied such a young woman, anywhere, I simply had to attract her attention, approach, and start a conversation. Chatting with Mrs. M. en Espanola is delightful and good practice.  Other languages have wonderful differences, and though I speak only English, I have studied the structure of many languages with interest.

Having many gay friends, by analysis I discovered that you can't write anything distinguishing
gays from others without sounding retarded. This is key I reckon

I was not prepared, and, may I say, am bowled over completely by a princess Pocahontas; who appears so nearly identical to Spirit Beauty, in facial features, hair color and length, that I have wondered curiously if they were the same person? I’m pretty sure not because each their eyes are clearly distinct from one another. Their demeanor is distinct as well,  Spirit Beauty’s each word comes reluctantly, carefully considered; in contrast Pocahontas’ freely expresses her mind to me. In chatting with the princess she taught me many important lessons, about chatting process foremost.  She is so kind and so expressive as she took me through, what I reckon is just a regular old new friend chat.to her. As I observed her literary form, syntax and style, her clever use of the repetition of 'enters' won me, so clearly to see that thing I was not capable of seeing in the past. Her queues of approval, encouragement, and later perhaps affection, raised real emotional attraction to her in my heart, and I am sure I have no clue about how she feelings or what she wants; that is for her to know and decide.  The gift I got from Pocahontas is courage!!! 
To make a quick recap:

1.      We ‘met’

2.      Me like

3.      We exchanged admiration

4.      I decided

5.      And Proposed imaginatively

6.      She handed me the Apple

7.      I bit



This has always been my base equation. Equivalency Si`--Equality No.  Do not fall into the linguistic aberration in the attractive definition of equality This is  vicious circle reasoning that ALWAY leads to error.



Of course I have no idea what she is thinking tonight. I am peacefully working and awaiting my fate without ambivalence. But with useful perception, including a path to more effectively assimilating into Facebook culture.  I have already changed the nature of my posts in all platforms. Memes are nothing new to the Shaman! In fact, decades ago, just a few years into my monastic vows, I lived in the Montrose section of Houston Texas, I had many friends, by far most are street persons of all descriptions. I would post signs in my window for friends  passing by, and to consider. These posted here now are only a few examples of them.

All thought, all love, all desire brings me camping. All I ever wanted, but cannot express- even yet,
 except that evidently  I have always had 'sex on the brain' but strength in my vows to resist all comers

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My landlady caught on to my book club and, in short, I made my first entrance into the State Hospital system. ha