Matrix of Reconciliation

“Thus abandoning the baseline right and wrong in all things and stepping into the realm of infinity.”   

-Comic Book Shaman

As a boy I listened to Joni Mitchell play after Led Zepplin on FM radio. fuck labels.

Matrix of Reconciliation

I grew up believing that justice can be had if I can only sufficiently articulate the point of contention in my own favor. This family dynamic is the main underlying factor in my cognitive development, and so is now the focus of my life and artwork. As a child of the 1960s I was blessed with every advantage our culture offered, save only wealth. Still as a white man in that era I enjoyed every other advantage the times offered, I was hired for nearly every job I applied for; my youth, intelligence and regular appearance brought me acceptance at every social strata that I encountered.  In the 1970s I experienced discrimination vicariously, as women and so called minority persons were rejected out of hand in applying for open positions at my workplaces.  I think this, more than any reason I can name caused me to quit a number of good jobs, suffering anguish and disgust at the bigoted attitudes of employers and co-workers. I came to perceive my entire culture as fake and hypocritical.

My unconventional attitudes grew from these perceptions, and I drifted through the following decades seeking some way to elude the suffering I felt; without then really understanding what it was that caused it. I felt there must be some justification for this horrible injustice that I was missing, but as I investigated many interconnected subjects and whole fields of knowledge; I came to understand that the very institutions that purport to oppose discrimination and poverty in our society are in fact the greatest offenders; government, religions, educational institutions and the media are all dedicated to maintain themselves unchanged. As such they are all agents of great injustice, and in opposition to individual self-determination.

This realization led me to a simple cognitive analytic tool: to look carefully at perceived negative aspects of all things apparently positive, and also for positive aspects of seemingly negative ones. Thus abandoning the baseline right and wrong in all things and stepping into the realm of infinity. Ingrained in dominant culture are infinite financial ambitions that when viewed are on their face unjust in terms of limits and contradictions. For every good reason to do something there is always a counterpoint that at least discourages it. With the assumption that everyone decides what they will choose to do in any particular situation; also each person’s choices will vary widely according to circumstances. It is clear that the seeming intractable nature of injustice is rooted in the disconnected decisions of individuals. At this juncture the apparent complexity implied seems daunting, but in the perspective of infinity that complexity shrinks down to a clear sort of order.

Here captured just a few seconds of a performance by DeZorah, of McAllen TX.

All of the varied decisions made by individuals in the context of a family, a class at school, or a work shift seem knowable or predictable, but drawing back the lens to consider the same of a whole city, an entire state, or nation: impossible. Remarkably all of this falls into predictable channels as a matrix of humanity becomes apparent, so that seemingly impossible complexities are found to contain countless similarities of intentions. We are only prevented from seeing these by our fear and distractions caused by diverse aspects of each life, personal concerns and responsibilities. These fears and distractions result in all poverty, injustice and violence in our culture.

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The key aspect of all of my work is that it is done on ashoestring budget. These pix were shot to test my ‘new’ camera, a pawn shop find for $32.50 including tax and a 6 month warrantee. Most of the above shots are with the continuous feature. The results are a little too dark in the available light at Hitones, but I still like the capture of the performers acts on that night. The flash pix turned out better, and all in all this little Elph 340 hs is a step up in my gear and I hope will improve the look of my work.

    If I may be said to own a heart; I reckon it is contained here. -Comic Book Shaman