Ghostdance Shaman Process: February 2015

COSPLAY is the spawn of the inward mind's gaming experience echoing into life. I LIKE this spirit! As I aim to maintain it very much so myself. I think that playing out our minds, our happiness, and our voices at a young age is quite advisable. As young persons are typically beautiful, and sexually developing; each themselves, it is fine that this cosplay form allows players to get their feelings right honestly out; and to try on any roles freely and face only the good natured criticism of peers of all stripe.

COSPLAY: RECIPE FOR NONCONFORMITY AND
SELF RELIANCE AND FAIRPLAY.

It has long been clear to me that misplaced fears have held many people back by cultural constraints from healthy sexual development; that are unsupportable in the modern world we live in. These harvested cosplay images below that I have borrowed to illustrate this blog post, are indicative of young people learning to make their own decisions about friends, attire and their own sexualities is a very healthy and mostly safe manner. As a painter who has painted mainly young women as a long career, I see that typically young women may boom into amazing grace and physical beauty as they emerge from adolescent puberty. But this is only a point on the spectrum of a female person's whole life of changing physicality. Cosplay allows young women to have increased power in this chronological point in their life earned by something INCLUDING their own sexuality; but not DEPENDING solely upon that sexuality in the same exclusive way as was practically required of women in past times.

More On Civil Disobedience

By Comic Book Shaman

Chapter 3 part one of two

To Consider all Aspects of Objects,

of People, of Events and of Situations

195

Inappropriate Lecture

I was experiencing this accelerated mania on the day I got to teach the fifth grade class. If I had stuck to the lesson plan it probably would have been okay, but rather than simply give the kids the project and let it occupy them, I improvised a little lecture about language and learning, and in my enthusiasm uttered one or two words that were inappropriate. Apologizing I asked the class to write down the inappropriate words I had spoken, and collected the papers. The teacher sat in the back of the room and shook her head, and I saw the entire project slipping away from me. I might have saved things yet if I had carried through with the lesson, but I panicked and ran.

196

Stupid or Crazy?

The next day I went back and Siro informed me that he couldn’t use me any more. I had expected this, and although it hurt I knew I had to accept it. Sadly Siro tried to give me a check for the lessons I had performed, and it offended me so deeply that instead of getting on my bike and riding away I sat down in the grass and refused to leave. The policeman asked me whether I wanted to go to jail or the mental health. I wasn’t afraid of jail, I hadn’t done anything wrong, but it was a Friday, and I probably wouldn’t see the judge until Monday. The mental health was a big unknown. Terry had told me all about it, and had sternly warned me not to sign anything. “The door is open,” he would stress over and over again. The cops took me to the Crisis Center, and refused to believe that I had never been there before. I refused to sign their permission to treat form for a long time, but I was frightened and confused and hungry and I wanted a cigarette, so I finally signed to get out of there. They told me to go to the hospital to see a doctor for a prescription within the week or the constables would come and get me.

197

A Bitter Pill

Sandy came and got me out, and she tried to reassure me that it was no big deal, but I was emotionally torn. For some reason I was deeply attached to my perceived sanity. I was ashamed and offended and refused to consider any sort of treatment. My week ran out and they came and took me away. Once incarcerated I realized that I had to co-operate if I wanted to regain my freedom. I allowed them to treat me with Lithium because I was satisfied that it couldn’t hurt me. I was, and am still less than satisfied with the safety of the various anti-psychotic drugs they prescribed for me, but I reasoned that the doses were so small they may not be dangerous.

198

Initial Incarceration

The day after I arrived at the Mental Hospital the Feds pulled their raid on Mt. Carmel, up near Waco. The enormity of the raid itself, let alone the horrendous results of the fire, was enough to reassure me of the moral bankruptcy of our federal government. There are simply no limits to its depravity, and no hope of effectively reforming it within its present structure. I believe I am a patriot, after all in many nations in the world I would be locked up or shot for holding and expressing my beliefs. I understand and revere my freedom and recognize from whence it came. It was with great despair that I sat incarcerated, seeing my life and my country disintegrating before my eyes. But if there’s anything I know how to do its how to go with the flow, and by accepting my diagnosis of being BI Polar, and promising to take my medicine I was eventually released.

199

Turned Out

Meanwhile Sandy had freaked out and didn’t trust me anymore. She contacted my parents, who came and moved all my possessions out of the apartment and back to San Antonio. Leaving Houston ended a period of unparalleled happiness and creativity for me, and without the patient support of my parents I would have surely sunk into depression. Not that I wasn’t plenty depressed by developments, but with a little help from my friends I was at least distracted, and set out to pursue my interests.

200

Fun With Language

At first I primarily pursued my interest in language. Not in learning other languages, but studying the nature of language, and other languages in relation to the English language. Mainly by translating certain English vocabulary words into other languages. I found that sub-consciously, in my elevated mental state, I could understand a good deal of languages I had no conscious knowledge of. I discovered that if you translate most any random group of words, using say, an English/Russian, Russian/English dictionary, The words tend to take a different turn in meaning in Russian than they had in English. These differences may be subtle or not so subtle, but they are always humorous. A collection of various language dictionaries is a valuable resource to anyone interested in writing jokes or comedy, and who practice the method I described. I longed to rekindle my interest in comic books, but in 1993 there was practically nothing being published I cared to read. Love and Rockets by Los Bros. Hernandez and Russ Cochran’s EC reprints were the only books worth reading that I could find on the stands. Fortunately my old friend Bill welcomed me back, and was always ready to let me bend his ear.

201

I Lost My Spirit

I found that I had lost my spirit. The intangible force that propelled me had dissipated, leaving me a practically worthless man. The strong attachment I held to my perceived sanity, and the perception that undergoing treatment somehow diminished this sanity upset my practice entirely. All the outward aspects of meditation and personal practices went on as always, but my spirit no longer buoyed my actions and perceptions. I cast about for a spell that would regain me my spirit. I reasoned that it had to come from my Art, so I began to simply park my truck in various places and put out my paintings to be viewed by drivers passing by in traffic.

202

Roadside Gallery

My intention was that people should see my work. I was not concerned with selling my paintings, in fact I regret the few I had sold up to this point. I perceived that my paintings were more valuable to me as an assembled body of work. The trick would be to stage an exhibition. Curiously I have never attempted to interest a gallery in my work. I am repelled by the idea of asking someone else to assume a financial interest in my paintings. What I desire is that galleries should come to me seeking a financial interest in my paintings. Perhaps a strange and unlikely to be fulfilled desire for an invisible man.

203

Folk Art

My paintings are very valuable, and their value is inherent. Not because I painted them, but because someone painted them, and they contain a level of thought and emotion and proficiency that they may speak to a person and impart their value. It is difficult to assign a dollar value to them, except to set the price at a level that is significant to my circumstances, so that parting with a painting is worthwhile.

204

Subsistence Resolution

I understood perfectly well that showing my Art on the side of the road is unlikely to attract the attention of a wealthy patron, such as one might hope to find in a gallery. I was nevertheless, more concerned that large numbers of people view my work, and getting feedback is at least as valuable to me as are sales. I resolved to work at a mundane job to support myself, and continue with my Art at whatever level I am able to manage.

205

Nick

By this time I had befriended a buddy of Bill’s from Johnson City, TX, named Nick Martin. Nick was a burley, bearded, bear of a biker. Formidable in appearance but with a heart of gold, he often invited me up to his ranch, and always made me feel at home. When his new old lady and her children moved in, I became close to the whole family and attached to the children. I was taken with Nick’s contradictory appearance and personality, and persuaded him to pose for a painting. During this time I conceived an Arts Festival celebrating all the lively arts, and focusing on dance and human development. This festival required a great deal of space for various stages and facilities. God knows where I planned to get the money to pay for it but I had a scheme that appealed to Nick when I told it to him, and he consented to hold it on his ranch, and Bill agreed to maintain the financial end. I called the festival Ghostdance 96, a title that would prove ironic.

207

Summer of a Lifetime

I went to work for a temp agency doing carpentry work, largely for various grocery chains. I appreciated temporary work because it allowed me freedom to take time off when I felt it was necessary. One job took me to Houston occasionally where I renewed old friendships. In getting back in touch with Rick Rodriguez, he told me that he and his wife, Rene, wanted to offer his Galveston beach house to me for a month or so. I took him up on it immediately and packed up my truck with Art and supplies, and set out for Galveston. I contacted the Urquieta’s and arranged to do some improvements to their house on a part time basis. Working for them in Houston Friday through Sunday, and relaxing and painting Monday through Thursday. As I had been working regularly for some time, and still resented the daily medication and monthly degradation of the Public Health, I was careless and scornful of it. Embracing denial I built a magical dream house of Art there in Galveston, and entitled it Weekdays. I painted a small sign and set it out in the street to invite the brave to observe Art, books and beads within, on weekdays. I was blissfully manic.

208

Galveston

The first week I set out to write a comic book explaining my concept of the Ghostdance. Its eventual completion was a work of perfect expression of mania. It is the precursor of this book, and seeks to convey much the same thing at a higher level. I also set out to talk with as many people as I could, and to photograph as many skaters, surfers, tattoos and pretty girls as I decently could. I picked out my favorite jetty and made it my church, which I decorated with washed up debris, artfully arranged, with a cross of driftwood lashed with plastic six pack holders. I went there to meditate and pray every morning and night. I visited tattoo parlors and Art galleries and developed favorite haunts and restaurants. On Friday I went to the Urquieta’s and performed my work satisfactorily, if somewhat lackadaisically. By this time my personality was at best somewhat obnoxious. I stopped taking my medicine, and resolved to be through with it.

209

Spirit Totems

The second week I continued. I had a number of objects with me, sticks and stones and the like, of interesting character, that I had picked up on Nick’s ranch and at the beach. I painted and decorated them with animal skins and feathers, beads, tokens and objects of various descriptions that convey some meaning. I thought of these objects as spells, or Indian books. I have studied and admired indigenous cultures throughout my life. I was born in Indiana; I am a Native American. I am not however of an indigenous culture in the sense that I use the term “Indian.” If I have learned and practice certain aspects of Indian culture, I still have no claim to tribal rights maintained by Indian nations. However my tribe is the hippie nation, and we are like the stars in the sky, in our numbers and in the aspirations of my people. My Indian Books are like open, decorated and displayed medicine bags. A collection of seemingly meaningless objects that hold meaning to their owners. Each object representing some dharma that upholds her spirit. They are a means of organizing and storing vast information of the mind without words, writing, pictures or computers. Each piece contains the spirit of the object, stick or stone, the spirit of the animals who gave their skin or feathers, the spirit of the paint and the decorations all combines with the spirit of the artist to create an object that contains this spirit. Only an understanding of the spirit or affinity for it can bring appreciation of such objects or give them value.

210

Practical Aspiration

I don’t want to be in the business of mass producing cool objects, rather I wish to produce cool objects in a personal, invested manner. I perceive the market for my Art as quite large, if I can only reach it. It is certainly larger than I could service producing at full tilt boogie. I require only space, time and peace to produce volumes of Artwork, but I have produced so much that storing it is a problem. My Indian Books were a solution to bulky paintings by being compact and easy to maintain.

211

Misbehavior

By the third week my mania had accelerated to an oppressive level. My concentration and practice were greatly diminished, and I ate and slept erratically. I couldn’t sit still or focus on my Art, or running the gallery or working for the Urquieta’s. I was oppressively tired all of the time and spent countless hours walking in either the Montrose or in Galveston, befriending the homeless, observing the normal population and tourists, and experiencing a particular perspective that painted me as beautiful and repellant simultaneously. Most of the friends I made in my first week in Galveston I burned out by the third. I became exhausted and had neither the energy nor the spirit to complete my work for my patrons, and I misbehaved so that they dismissed me and no longer loved my company. I was fucked up.

212

Un-Psychic

I digress at this point to describe a practice I developed that I call Un-Psychic readings. I developed this technique through long association with all sorts of people, and a lifelong pursuit of literature. Anyone who has read a thousand books may certainly perform this service by their acquired knowledge of human experience and human nature. I talk to the subject conversationally about her concerns for perhaps five minutes. I ask a number of specific questions regarding any pertinent means, emotions or relationships. With this data one may assemble a 75-90% complete picture of her situation, and can pronounce insights to her life that she may find cathartic. There is nothing really psychic about it; I just know how to do it. I began this practice at a young age and perfected it during my positive manic period in the Montrose. It is an amusing parlor trick that many foist off as psychic deviation.

213

Really Hammered

After the third week I was doing this un-psychic reading constantly, to everyone. Without my little job with the Urquieta’s I had no income and resorted to hustling my few odd possessions, and asking my parents for a little bread. I realized I had a problem and attempted to get back with my medicine. I decided that what I needed was a little time alone in the woods, so I took off for Nick’s ranch. I was in a mental state akin to being on pure LSD, and I was flying higher than ever in my life. When I stopped at an isolated gas station off of I-10 west of Houston I was spotted by some local law enforcement officers, and taken into custody. Fortunately I had long since smoked up all my dope, so I was unafraid and co-operated entirely.

214

Busted

They took me to their county lock up at about 10 PM and cleared out the front tank, gave me a blanket and locked me up. I had suspended my concern about time. For it was beyond my power to control my situation. I folded my blanket and sat down on the concrete floor. I sat for some hours, and observed my mind as it incessantly ran down the minutia of my life and the past two weeks. After a while I got up and swept all the dust in the cell into the drain. I devised a musical scheme of the sounds made by the hot and cold water dispenser. I slept a little, and in all passed the most pleasant night in recent memory.

215

Yoko Eased My Pain

In the morning they came and led me into the general population area of the jail. As they led me to a small isolation type holding cell, someone approached me and sprayed something into my eyes. It burned like pepper spray, and they gave me a towel and shoved me into the cell. I thought of Yoko Ono. I saw her face and she told me there was water in the drain, and I soaked it up into the towel and bathed my eyes until the pain receded. I waited and after a time they brought me some food. Finally they opened the door and told me they were taking me to the Austin State Hospital. They wrapped me in chains, every kind of way to restrict my movement. They put me in the back of a cruiser and drove me to Austin, where they collected my chains and turned me over to a young lady at the admissions desk. The A.S.H. was like a vacation. It provided an open campus, frequent opportunities to go outside and smoke, and competent doctors and staff. They got my records and stabilized me on my medicine in just a few days. My parents came and got me out, and the next day I was on a bus back to Galveston.

216

No Easy Lay

I can’t explain the following events without being completely frank about my sexual preferences. I have remained celibate since 1989. Never in that time have I been tempted to break my celibacy, because no woman I wanted has wanted me in return. I define my celibacy as abstaining from vaginal penetration with my penis. Beyond that I am open to such human interaction as comes my way. In my life I have known any number of girls and women whom I befriended and analyzed at various levels. As a young man in Florida I experimented with sponging off lonely women for fun and profit. Many artists are faced with this aspect of life, and find subsistence there. But I conceived that sex has meaning, and I only wanted it with someone I cared about and who cared for me back. Not that my standards are so high, but I have to be at least interested, and she has to be willing. Sadly in my life I passed up most of the willing women I have met because I was busy trying to coerce the one I was after.

217

A Monk

As I am living as a monk, it is natural that I feel compassion, and listen to people who have problems that no one will listen to. The homeless, runaways, prostitutes, junkies, oddballs, religious fanatics, pimps and pushers all have their stories, and will tell them to you in minute detail if you take the time to listen. Listening isn’t painful because it’s all new, and by listening we can give dignity to a person who may receive precious little in her life. I have befriended many young girls and provided them with a little food and company, a safe place to crash, and even a little instruction in Art and Art appreciation, meditation techniques or whatever dharma was appropriate to their situation.

218

Naked and Free

In return I received a fair amount of hugging and squeezing, massages, nakedness and exchanged body heat on cold nights. I was regaled with horrors of human depravity and inspired by the courage of these young women, who only want a chance to be free. The essential non-sexual nature of our interactions was entirely understood and appreciated by both parties. My intention in these interactions is to provide a positive male role model to young girls, who badly need one, so that they have one man in their lives who didn’t screw them. So my preference is to interact as freely as possible with naked young girls. Their bodies please me enormously, and their hungry young minds excite me and we may innocently and properly interact in infinite manners, to the detriment of no one and to the benefit of all concerned. But I am only a monk, not a saint, and I don’t particularly care to hear another person’s complaints incessantly. My experience with people, but especially women, is that they are obsessed with their problems and express them endlessly. As this arises in my relationships my benevolence evaporates and my friends move on.

219

Walks on Shells

I was sitting in church one sunny afternoon and I observed some girls walking down to the jetty, which is composed partially of massive stones containing fossilized seashells, which are quite uncomfortable to walk across barefooted. Two of the girls walked gingerly across to the smoother stones, but one girl didn’t change her stride as she walked across the shells. She appeared to be about fifteen years old, and I conceived her as a symbol of the strength and power of all such young girls and named her Walks on Shells. Walks on Shells are a fully formed personality, intent on intellectual self-improvement. She is competent and intent on learning about, and accomplishing tasks that she undertakes. She is recognized for her abilities, respected for her activities and trusted for her character. She has the power of a young woman that I conceive she should keep for herself rather than abandon to ill-considered actions or self-objectification.

220

Girl Power

I think of Walks on Shells as a Girl Mind Scouts sort of operation that would promote mentor relationships for girls aged 14 to 16, in which they can participate in actual ventures and receive commensurate compensation. The point being to give status for achievement to a group who presently receive such status mainly by their appearance or sexual function. I have deduced that shoring up this small segment of the population just so will have a rejuvenating effect on our whole society. Are you Walks on Shells? In my manic condition I contemplate broadly and deeply, and connections branch out in webs, and I realized that if I could attract, captivate and empower a section of the population of Walks on Shells’ demographics it would generate enough power to propel my operations.

221

Childhood Heroes

My assumption is that everyone is an artist, and for each individual developing their Art is the surest means to prosperity, and is for everyone their equal chance at fame and fortune. My childhood hero was John Lennon. He was a bad boy, middle class nobody whose Art brought him world prominence. His songs set the ideal for my personality and formed my perceptions of the world. I was just a kid when he got with Yoko Ono. Learning that such a person as Yoko Ono existed, and who practiced this mystifying form of Art that impressed John enough to leave that blonde was a penetrating reality to me at ten years old. Although I have never pursued any of her artwork nor even seen much of it, I take great solace in Yoko’s existence. If you were to ask me which living artist I feel the greatest affinity with I would answer Yoko Ono.

222

Women Suffer

Women experience half of the pain felt in the world, and at least the simple majority of that is psychic pain. Such pain may color a person’s whole life. It is a BI-product of our culture and our history, and is inflicted subtly or blatantly on all women in our society. Of course we can shrug off prejudice and stupidity, but a steady diet of it is distasteful, and oppressive to the spirit. The only practical solution is personality and intellectual development, and this can come only from within each individual. Like Art.

223

Carpenter’s Helper

Walks on Shells organized, addresses a segment of the population who may begin to turn things around. My plan for the rest of the population is that they should combine their pursuit of their Art with a career that offers self-improvement. If you wish to improve your personality and develop your intellect, and wish to learn valuable skills, consider becoming a carpenter’s helper. A carpenter’s helper must be intelligent, alert, honest, hardworking, and able to read a tape measure and use a saw with common proficiency. She must be able to get the lay of the land and accomplish the tasks that are necessary for the operation of the crew. She must keep her mouth shut and do what she is told. She must understand her function and fulfill her responsibilities, from cutting rafters to cleaning the job site. She makes good money, if not great, and may earn respect and status on her crew by hard work and efficiency.

224

Self Improvement

Practicing carpenter helping is beneficial to the artist in a number of ways. First you work with materials that are real and substantial, and the work makes you sure, and careful in its execution. Second you work with mathematics and spatial dimensions, which strengthens your mental functioning. Next you are responsible for showing up every day, because your function is essential to the working of the crew. By working hard you merit good treatment and regular advancement and raises. The requirements of a helper are modest, hammer, tape measure, square, pencil, utility knife, chalk box and a nail bag are all that’s required for employment. Many are called but few succeed in maintaining the position of carpenter’s helper. They are in constant demand, but most applicants fail because they don’t appreciate the dignity of the job, or the job gives them no dignity. It is a temporary job by nature because one transcends it with a few years serious application, or can find easier and more lucrative employment elsewhere with the skills of a good helper. The benefits are outdoor work, honest labor and accomplishment, and the satisfaction of creating homes that will shelter people for their lives.

225

Connecting Artists

My idea is to operate a sort of temp agency connecting artists seeking sustenance with builders who need competent, dedicated workers. With minimal training an intelligent artist could be prepared to step into any operation and perform effectively. Building homes is so pleasant that sometimes I wonder why everyone doesn’t try it, at least for awhile. Of course they don’t for reasons involving money, but if we all built houses we could all be substantial and become credit worthy, and we could build houses for one another, so that everyone had a home. Even though a thing is impossible it may still be considered. This is the essence of Art. There are other trades besides carpenter, and the helper principles can apply to any endeavor.

226

A Sinking Ship

In pursuit of the impossible I set off again for Nick’s ranch to seek the solace of the woods and the council of Nick and his family. I was still manic, but inspired and optimistic about the future. I arrived to a cheerful reception and we arranged my favorite campsite away from everything, and made plans for a Ghostdance POW WOW around the campfire that evening. I greeted young Holly and pronounced her Walks on Shells, and told her about my idea, and she kind of grooved on it. We socialized and partied for a while and a couple of times Holly innocently became a bit more friendly than I thought was good for a young girl, and I wanted to make her aware of my perception of her behavior. A rational person would forget it, a concerned person might take it up with her mother, but a whacked out, manic artist spoke up frankly, with apparently shocking vocabulary. Poor Holly, Debra, her mother, and Nick were appalled, and I sunk my ship before it could sail. Nick and Debra soon forgave me, of course, but the magic spell of the Ghostdance was dissipated, and before it could be rekindled Nick Martin passed away, younger than I, of a weak heart did. Nick touched the hearts and minds of a multitude of friends, and his funeral was the most densely attended in my experience. I was miserable as I left the ranch and returned to Galveston. The magic was over and Rick contacted me and informed me he had other use for his house.

227

Opportunity for Intelligence

I returned to San Antonio and temporary work. At this point my evolution as an artist is complete to my present stage of development as an outsider artist. Subsequent autobiographical information is fairly irrelevant at this point. I cannot separate my Art from my mental process or my mental disorder, so I have addressed them in the detail that I have to indicate how I evolved. Each individual has her own obstacles to overcome. If we can remove obstacles to personality and intellectual development from our youth, they may literally give us a golden future by creating their own for themselves. There is and never can be a shortage of opportunity for intelligent, hardworking people in a stable economy in a peaceful world. Therefore we must maintain peace at any cost, and husband our economies, whether individual, local, state, federal or global. Transcend Democracy, which is after all two wolves and a sheep voting on the menu.

The Law

228

Eat the Rich

Vote with your whole person, by right livelihood, and solve your own problems through application and community. Relegate political office holders to mere essential functionaries, without power or prestige, but to be honored and respected for their capability, sacrifice and wisdom. Return our federal government to the integrity of its Constitution and abolish the hated income tax and the oppressive bureaucracy. Our present government expends enormous resources to tell us not to drink and drive, to wear seat belts, not to do drugs, to nurture our youth, not to smoke cigarettes, to subsidize tobacco farmers and not to leave your keys in your car. My old World Book contained an article about that guy Goebles, who was a proponent of propaganda, which his government nefariously used to de-humanize people for political purposes. This was bullshit when the Nazis pulled it, and we kicked their ass for it, or so we thought.

229

Propaganda

Our government didn’t care what the Nazis did, only how they did it to allies. Within a generation of defeating fascism, America had adopted its form in total. Today’s propaganda is insidious and unnecessary in a society of thinking people. Propaganda is bullshit and most particularly when it is propagated by the state. This is an irrefutable law. Any such message that people may wish to propagate may be done by private subscription to better effect. Our freedom and our power come to us from only one source, and it is the foundation of all of our society, the law.

230

Unalienable Rights

Our law was established by the Magna Charta in the year 1215, at which time the people got King John’s back against the wall, and extracted certain unalienable rights for English speaking subjects and established English Common Law. People finally had a right to own property and not be deprived of it arbitrarily, and a right to trial and civil protections. These things were unheard of at the turn of the last millenium; today they are taken for granted. But our rights were hard won in human evolution, and are currently subject to political whim.

231

The Constitution

The Constitution of the United States is a unique and wonderful document, that elegantly constructs our Republic, which is meant to be self sustaining and offer minimal intrusion into its citizens’ lives and affairs. Our Constitution is vital for its structure of the functions of government, and its limitations of the power of office holders to act without consensus. It is the authority by which the federal and various state legislatures pass the myriad laws that regulate our society. Lessor bodies pass statutes and ordinances, and the President and state Governors may issue executive orders that perform as laws. These are all separate and inferior to Constitutional law, mere political expedients accumulated over time, and codified into an increasingly complex world of its own devise.

232

Baffling System

Such has been necessary perhaps with the existing level of human development, where a common working person was not expected to understand her own affairs, and needed to hire a lawyer to tend to them. As the general population became literate, lawyers evolved an increasingly complex and baffling system that insured their employment. As the population became sophisticated, law, regulation and taxation spawned an industry of lawyers, accountants and bookkeepers. The present system is bewildering and expensive, and jammed with people who are made criminals by political dictation. We have simply evolved as human beings beyond the limitations of our present system. We shall never solve our societal problems by fertilizing the status quo with money, ideas or activity. It is the season to prune.

233

Trust Your Practice

Practicing law is like practicing Art. It requires mental labor and dedication to self-improvement. It carries a trust to do good in your practice, and at the very least not to do wrong. Like the artist, the lawyer performs an essential service at our present stage of human development. An artist who pursues the practice of law may discover some means to simplify its practice and perhaps even readjust the economic dynamics of the industry.

Medicine

234

At Home in Our Bodies

No less immediate to our lives is the practice of medicine. We are at home in our bodies, and it behooves us to maintain them, as best we may. Medicine implies science, and we all profit by the study of science and the scientific method. Understanding nutrition is crucial to maintaining good health. Composing our diets of nutritious foods, and avoiding foods we know to be detrimental, is core to good health and happy prosperity. And what goes in must come out, a regular cycle with consistent result is most desirable, and anything less is cause for concern. When the body is excited and particularly stimulated it may experience orgasm, which is a real physical and spiritual thing. The mind experiences its own sort of orgasm called kundalini, which is a physical and spiritual sensation experienced by the mind as a result of chemical changes in the brain provoked by thought. Kundalini is commonly experienced by religious people, and is understood as rapture.

235

Of Orgasms

Of orgasms it is instructive to understand their function. They are notification and reward for successful copulation for reproductive purposes. For as long as people have existed it has been crucial that we reproduce, and this instinct moves us deeply. Life was short and unpredictable and a family was the ideal structure in support of life. Today we have essentially transcended this need and voluntary reproduction is quite sufficient for maintaining the population. This was not true in Christ’s time, and catholic values perpetuated the population to the extent that certain Biblical truth has become less relevant. Today the orgasm is essentially separated from its reproductive purpose. It is something of a commodity around which many structure their existence. This is natural because the orgasm is the cheapest way to experience the elevated mind.

236

Orgasm’s Power

The power of the orgasm lies in its reality. The sensory build-up around and the orgasm itself fall within the bounds of elevated personality and intellect. When we are getting regular sex we experience an elevated mental outlook and generally perform in a more efficient manner. A person may become proficient at creating her own orgasms and derive satisfaction even from that. Sadly all that sex can confuse a person and she may not perceive the elevated mind beyond sex. Do not make sex more than it is. The feelings that you express sexually represent more than an orgasm, and these interactions deeply affect your life.

237

Mental Orgasms

The rush of kundalini is a more subtle sensation than an orgasm, but emotionally it may be a much more fulfilling thing. It blossoms unexpectedly when the mind is functioning at high level, and may seem to invest our thoughts with divine affirmation. Kundalini is often experienced while smoking marijuana, and the familiar head rush prized among hippie dope smokers is the phenomenon I describe. It is commonly experienced as a prolonged and intense form called rapture. Thought of a religious nature which is closely held and experienced in life often triggers rapture, which is a temporary feeling of well being and great emotion by which you feel like laughing and crying all at once. I’ve seen books that discuss this phenomenon and they attribute all sorts of causes and effects of kundalini, both chemical and spiritual. I can only say for sure that it is a very real and welcome thing in my life, which I experience every day. My prolonged and continued mental labors have paid this dividend at least, that I may trigger these mental orgasms in my normal thought.

238

Medical Learning

Dreams are the release of the mind from the reality of mundane existence. They are significant, as are daydreams, and they serve dual functions in sub-conscious and conscious mental development. Finally physical exercise is beneficial to human health and development, and will improve and prolong life. All of these are personal concerns that we must each sort out for ourselves. If we are diligent and competent we may maintain our own health by a steady accumulation of medical learning.

239

Aches and Pains

Physical pain has causes. These causes may be diagnosed. Most diagnoses suggest remedies. We each must learn to deal with pain. Having read Kipling as a boy, I learned that pain is in the mind, and that a person may overcome pain by deciding not to submit to it. Consequently I am unconcerned with aches and pains generally, and when I am injured, beyond the initial pain I turn off the residual and it disappears. If we suffer injury or disease we must seek a doctor for treatment. Here money becomes a sad factor in our health equations. Mostly our health concerns are minimal and we manage to afford medical treatment. If we are lucky and can afford insurance coverage, but there also are many that cannot. When health care is denied for financial reasons, minor treatable conditions may fester into something worse, which creates a monstrous bill by it eventual treatment.

240

Universal Insurance

I cannot conceive that it would be unprofitable to offer modest insurance policies universally that could be paid for through payroll deductions, and allow all common medical care to be administered at affordable cost. Everyone would participate at a level she chooses to pay for. The level of demand for health care brought about by universally available insurance will rejuvenate the entire industry. Medicines with universal demand may be produced more economically. Devices and technologies may be mass-produced and distributed around the globe at arranged terms, beneficial to all parties. The impact of this phenomenon alone would spark economic prosperity in the entire nation.

241

Health’s Lottery

What about catastrophic illness and disease that may cost millions to treat? These things are like a lottery after all, we get our ticket at birth and our genes are a factor we can only now recognize, and cannot yet even structure an imagination of what they mean to us. Within our numerous populations some will get the AIDS, cancer, MS or MD or any of the others that devastate a family and their finances. Although their total numbers are enormous these unlucky people comprise only a tiny percentage of the population. It would behoove us to care for all such persons compassionately, for the cost is small split among us all, and any of us may succumb, ourselves or our family.

242

Health and Religion

So we live our lives as we choose, maintaining our health, and reaching a ripe old age. The question is less what comes after, surely that one is answered by what came before, but rather, was I happy? The accumulation of a multitude of good days in a lifetime makes it easier to shut our eyes for the last time. Who knows if or where or when we open them anew and begin another life. Interpretation beyond this point is meaningless, metaphorical and manipulative to present to others. Children profit from dogma, it gives meaning to a complex intellectual concept and a form of authority to adults and clerics who presumably understand the mysteries that confound us. Religion is a path to right livelihood, one as good as the next. Religion brings opportunity to serve personkind, and mental solace in life. I pray my hippie brothers and sisters around the world will advocate with their Art, the mutual respect and peaceful co-existence of all warring peoples. Compassion is the hammer that may flatten hatred to its smallest area. But hatred pursists bitterly, and must be consciously recognized and dismissed, sometimes for an intolerable period, but it may recede and disappear when we perceive that this is the best thing for ourselves.

243

Genetics

Although scientists have identified our genetic make up and can even make genetics do tricks; we are still far from comprehending the entirety of its nature. It is perhaps pre-mature to patent a gene, but such is proper so long as the license fee to study and exploit such genes is reasonable, so that research proceeds. Ultimately we need to collect enough data to understand the ramifications of genetic technology. It serves no purpose to impose ethical restrictions when we have not yet determined what we’re dealing with. If indeed fetal tissue may provide life saving properties, I think we should find out about them. Could we acquire fetal tissue naturally or without harming the fetus? Only diligent pursuit will bring us these answers. Artists who pursue the practice of medicine may imagine our way to conquering disease and physical decay, and perhaps the cure would not be worse than the disease. Maybe with all the facts we will learn stem cels may be derived from baby shit.

244

Mental Disorders

Of mental disorders I can speak from personal experience. Mental disorders are real things that the people who suffer from them know all to well. It’s dicey whether a person develops a disabling level of a mental disorder, it can happen to anyone. Today many debilitating mental disorders may be effectively treated with medication, but many mental health consumers need additional personality and intellectual development. Treating these three aspects of a person promises successful elevation over time. The history of my life is a chain of people who helped me when I needed it. They helped me to help myself, and this ability is my greatest asset. An artist who suffers a mental disorder might use her Art to express her unique perspective, and seek treatment, because for many disorders there are real benefits to medication. But I strongly enjoin you to investigate each medication you are prescribed, and satisfy yourself that it is safe. The mind chemistry is delicate and only a small dose of most drugs is needed to affect its action. Slight physical side effects are a worthy trade off for clear thought, but severe reactions make such medications ill advised.

Anthropology

245

Ascending Triangle

Anthropology reveals the curious fact that people are not influenced by something they have never experienced. People are entirely creatures of their experience, and this is why it is so important to expand our experience as much as possible. Through the constant struggle for improvement undertaken by a small segment of the population, the whole society they live in is elevated. Wassily Kandinsky wrote of the ascending triangle. Human development may be understood as an ascending triangle representing personkind. Imagine a triangle divided by two horizontal parallel lines into three sections. The top section represents the small segment of the population with elevated minds and developed personalities. Their efforts raise the triangle eternally upward. Beneath are the bulk of ordinary people who live their lives productively, and as the triangle rises they are carried to the place that the ones above once occupied alone. Beneath the general population are that group of incapable, unenlightened or immoral persons who exist despite all efforts to improve and reform them. Even they who cannot help themselves are brought up in intelligence by the ascending triangle, but always they remain at the bottom. The metaphor is accurate, and reflects what is happening in our society.

246

Future Help

As the next generation reaches computer literacy to complement its elevated minds, everything I have written may come true. The primitive people of Christ’s time were anthropologically far removed from today’s population. As the concept of the elevated mind spread, personkind developed at the pace that innovation could be disseminated. Knowledge is power, and as it has been widely disseminated and commonly absorbed we people truly have more power than ever before. We common people have wrested our freedom from the state in 1215 and 1776 and it is time to do it again to begin the 21^st century. There is much work to do in bringing the rest of the world to parity with the United States, but the recognition of certain inalienable rights of all peoples, and the institution of common law in areas that presently have none will make them the fields that shall grow liberty, equality and prosperity for people who today face only poverty, ignorance and degradation. The primary obstacles to peace and prosperity are the lack of understanding of their causes and the greed and short sightedness that prevents us from simply doing what is right. As we each individually embrace compassion and right livelihood we materially shift the balance of power towards redemption for society. Everybody counts.

Events

247

Happy Birthday

Events proceed through time and space. Events bring changes great and slight, and are in all cases keys to advancement, if we understand and anticipate them. The event of our birth created a vast, insatiable demand for the elements of life. So too it created a store of experience and capability to effectively produce a surplus of goods and services. Humanity is equal and universal in this capacity. The only differences fall into the three categories of the ascending triangle that I described.

248

Scale Waco

Everything falls neatly into a scale of three. Good, better best or good, fair, poor or fast, faster, fastest are all scales that allow us to assign specific value in communication and understanding. Of course a scale may have infinite graduations, but three is Holy and will serve you well in your considerations and meditations alike. Consider the siege at Mt. Carmel and apply your own scale of propriety to its conduct and outcome. The raid itself was sadly, not unusual here in Texas. A similar posse of BATF feds, state and local police officers pulled identical hijinx at Nick’s ranch a month prior to the Waco siege and confiscated a number of firearms. Fortunately Nick had the sense not to resist and the means to assert his rights, and his property was returned to him, except for such few guns as was stolen in police custody.

249

Pay Up Or Else

I believe David Koresh had a condition similar to my own. I too can read the Bible with an ancient sensibility, so that I perceive its lessons deeply. What Koresh failed to perceive was that the Bible is an enlightened work of literature, constructed to inspire enlightenment in those who study its meaning, no more, no less. God’s hand in its construction and constitution is surely evident, as it is in every work of Art. When the Davidians were threatened they grabbed their guns when they should have grabbed their checkbook, because that was the intention of all those stormtroopers who came to church to collect for Caesar.

250

Unlawful Legal Confiscation

Based on the video tape evidence of the initial raid itself I deduce that the feds fired the first shots. The Davidians foolishly fired back and the rest is history. Those few unlucky agents of the government who perished in the raid are a debt owed by the federal bureaucracy, not the seventeen children who were horribly murdered at Waco. We do not need a federal Gestapo confiscating legal property from citizens that has been made illegal by statute for political purposes. When our federal government feels that it can assault a church, burn it to the ground with eighty occupants, while gunning them down as they attempt to flee the flames, it is not too soon to examine that government closely, to determine if we cannot make some changes. The sort of revolution I advocate is in the nature of changing all the locks and quietly changing everything.

Situations

251

A Precarious Situation

Each of us finds herself in a particular situation, composed of where we live, where we work (or don’t work), our family and friends, our interests, pursuits and interactions. The events at Waco placed us all in the situation of observing our government commit a horrible crime, and then left to swallow it raw by the state’s lies and the abuse of power by supposed public servants. Waco was not the first such abuse of power, and Vicky Weaver was not the first person murdered by federal agents over a petty tax beef. But Waco was too severe to be forgotten, and the pain festers yet in many, many persons. This pain was demonstrated two years later in Oklahoma City, where demented persons inflicted a similar crime upon the government. Neither act had a shred of sanity nor dignity nor righteousness connected to them, and the blood of Timothy McVeigh will bring only cold comfort.

252

Two Vulgar Words

To be polite there are two words one must never speak. These two words are very old, and may well remain from the time when we all spoke the same language. Military men adopted these words in ancient times to train troops who had no education but could at least understand them both. Both words are simultaneously nouns and verbs, and flexible enough to serve together as an entire serviceable vocabulary for a soldier. With these two words one may acquire or transmit situational understanding immediately, with only a few words. Observe: shit is a feces, people shit feces while their shit sits on the ground next to them. Soldiers battle in the shit, and individual soldiers take little shit from one another. Shit rolls downhill and an officer who dumps his shit on you is himself a shit.

253

Situational Awareness

Similar various meanings can be said of fuck. Alone and in combination these two words can express a world of meaning. Their value in military training was in teaching higher level perception to recruits who were anthropologically only a few steps above caveman. I am unaware of other words that display this peculiar quality. That is why they are vulgar and not to be uttered before women and children, because it may prove embarrassing for such persons to attain the higher function of situational awareness.

254

Chain of Situations

It is always valuable to meditate on any situation we may find ourselves engaged in. A situation may appear favorable or not on first examination, but it is important to always remember that we are an element. Taking command of a situation entails certain commitments and certain sacrifices. Better to be quiet and uncommitted and wait for your opportunity to affect a situation. Time and observation and contemplation bring understanding. Our position is stronger based on understanding if we let it guide our speech and action. Dealing from emotion we commit errors in judgement which diminishes our situational effectiveness. Large and small a chain of situations makes up our lives.

255

Essential Attitude

Employment is a situation we all must pursue as necessary for life, beyond its monetary reward. Whatever job we pursue, great or menial, we must perform it with dignity, so that it fulfils our inner need for distinction. Though your compensation may be meager always remember you agreed to the work and wages. If you find that you made a poor bargain, fulfil your obligation and resign. It doesn’t matter how someone else regards us or treats us, as long as we behave with dignity, honor our word and consistently labor for our security and prosperity. Do not believe that performing a menial job is beneath a person of your station. Such perceptions are obstacles to clear thought and understanding. A person may invest dignity in any job, and dignity will accrue to any individual who performs her work competently and cheerfully. Be aware that most jobs in America make demands on a worker’s life and psyche.

256

Work Depression

An employer may demand a set of behavioral standards that require you to transform your personality to earn a paycheck. Most often our job is not what we would choose to do but only what events and our situation has led us to. We may have a lifelong career undertaken only for money. So many of us live from paycheck to paycheck, dispersing our life’s income on essentials for survival. We see plainly that we have no opportunity to transcend our situation, so we buy lottery tickets, drink beer, get high, get laid or anything else to kill the pain that comes when our dreams are forever beyond our reach.

257

Pays Off for All

The humblest menial employee, the most hardened convicted criminal and the most degraded and demeaned woman may overcome all obstacles and attain happiness, security, employment and prosperity if she meditates, thinks and develops personally and intellectually, develops and pursues positive interests and gets up every day to work with dignity. Remember that the Arts are open to all persons, and are our best hope for attaining prosperity.